Welcome to BoxOffice Trailer Throw Down! Where we round up the week’s finest trailers so you don’t get sucked down a YouTube rabbit hole.
Between Spider-man: Homecoming, Daddy’s Home 2, and Home Again we have a lot of movies with the word “Home” in the title. Coincidence? Yeah. Yeah, probably.
THE GREATEST SHOWMAN
I didn’t know P.T. Barnum invented the term “Showbusiness.” I feel like shows have existed since…forever, maybe?
INGRID GOES WEST
#besties #KCIandJOJO #MaceTheBrideAtHerOwnWedding
PITCH PERFECT 3
Do you want to see a shark get punched? Oh, yes. It is in this trailer.
MY LITTLE PONY: THE MOVIE
There is nothing I can tell you about this movie and/or friendship that Princess Twilight Sparkle hasn’t already covered.
At no point in this trailer does anyone look like they are remotely having a good time. That is what we call irony, dear readers.
DADDY’S HOME 2
The dads’ dads come home for a second level of dads and Mel Gibson is a grandpa.
Jackie Chan’s daughter gets blown up and he is going to find out who did it with the power of kicks, guns, persistence, and a blanket made of leaves.
HAPPY DEATH DAY
It’s like Groundhog Day but if Bill Murray got murdered at the end of every day. So I guess Edge of Tomorrow is a better comparison… but with way more 50 Cent.
Based-on-a-true-story of a supreme court justice who enforced the law with his fists, jazz, and shotguns. I mean books. Definitely books.
You might be thinking, “Didn’t this movie just happen with Marky Mark?” To which I must say, yes. Yes, it did but this one has more Jake Gyllenhaal and fewer legs.
I’m always telling people, when you make a deal with supernatural forces to see your late child again make sure it is, in fact, the spirit of your own child to inhabit the possession doll. Classic rookie mistake.
This is a very stressful trailer with a lot of shooting.
Here is a movie about a girl following her dreams to be a dancer in Paris. Perhaps the opposite of DETROIT in every way.
It’s one of those movies where your Mom invites three of the younger dudes you have been hooking up with to live in your house with you and your kids but then your ex-husband shows up. You know, that old trope.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR SERVICE
War, bombs, PTSD, chocolate chip smiley face pancake, babies, feelings.
AMERICAN ASSASSIN (Red Band Trailer)
A man’s family is killed by terrorists so he becomes The Punisher and goes on a murderous revenge rampage until Amanda Waller signs him up for the Suicide Squad and even Batman trains him. I know I am mixing universes here but you know it’s spot on.
GOODBYE CHRISTOPHER ROBIN
After all those trailers about war, we will end things on a lighter note, leaving you with a story about how Winnie the Pooh stopped a war.
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